


Brothers – this is what we are and will be forever

by little_frodo



Category: Sons of Anarchy
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-27
Updated: 2016-10-04
Packaged: 2018-08-18 06:08:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8151757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/little_frodo/pseuds/little_frodo
Summary: Brothers never break promises – and this is what we are and will be forever. 
A promise that Jax and Opie always told each other. But does this still count when one of them suddenly falls in love with his brother?





	1. Gazes

**Author's Note:**

> This story is not really close to the tv show - I created my own little world with these amazing characters. Thanks for reading! :) Hope you enjoy it!  
> Remember: english is not my first language, so be gentle please :D Grammar is such a bitch!

Jax watched.

He always did. Hidden and curious, sometimes obvious. But he always did, if it was for a reason – when he said something – or for no reason.

Opie.

Opie Winston.

He sat not far away this day, somehow in front of Jax at the big table in the club house. In fact, Jax didn't even listen to what Clay was saying or to what Opie answered – he just watched, pulling on his cigarette.

The smoke was flowing out in little circles, a thing that Jax loved doing whenever he had inner stress – making weird circles with his smoke. Like a kid sometimes.

“I don't think this is good, Clay. It might be too dangerous. The Mayans won't be happy about it. In fact...”, Opie said, but Clay interrupted him quickly.

“I fucking don't want them to be happy, I want them to bleed.”

“But what about the revenge? We can't lose anyone. Not anymore.”

Jax sharply exhaled and put his fag-end down to the ashtray. He leaned back in his seat and watched Clay. Enough of Ope today.

“Clay, listen. Ope is right. You can't go out there and hope everything will be well if you fucking blow up their warehouse. They will come back and kill.”, he said.

Clay snorted. “What the fuck Jax? They won't kill anyone of us if we don't.”

“For sure they will. You know they have up half of an army in there, enough weapons to kill whole Charming. I don't think it's a good idea.”

He felt Opies eyes on him. But as always when this happened, Jax ignored the sharp pain of his heart beating in his chest. So hard it will break his rips one day, he knew. He wasn't sure about a lot of things, but this here – this was sure. He knew it since months and months, these feelings that were certainly no brother hood. Not like this. And it hurt.

Clay exhaled deep and watched the others.

“What do you guys say?”, he asked around, and Jax turned his head around looking for every member. Except for Opie. And he didn't moved until he felt that the deep green went away from his face. When he was safe again from his own, scared feelings.

Bobbie was the only one who answered.

“We should sleep one night over it. Better be. This is too heavy to decide on bases like this.”

Clay nodded. “Alright then, we'll have another meeting tomorrow evening. 7pm.”

Jax leaned back again in his chair and watched the others stand up one after another. When Opie stood up aswell, he kept his eyes on the wooden part of the table, just long enough until Opie wasn't able to look at Jax' face. Just then, nearly moment by time, Jax put up his gaze and watched Opie leaving the room.

Whatever this was, it was not right. It felt not right. In fact, it was way too hurting for somebody like Jax. The cold one, the cool one. The one that was always able to keep his mask on his face whenever he was with the club.

Inside, the “cool one” was fucked up like never before. He felt unsteady, unsure and hurt. Hurt every time he saw Opie talking and laughing with somebody else. Hurt whenever he saw Opie kissing Donna and angry about the fact he wishes to be at Donnas place. Angry about the feelings he felt, the thoughts he thought, the pure fact that he was unable to tell anything about this. He was not even able to write it down. It was all locked up in his head – and in his heart.

He remembered the first time he felt this way for Opie as if it was just yesterday – although it was many months ago.

 

 

_They've had a few beers, a few too many – and too much whisky. Jax sat on a leather sofa with the rest of an opened whisky bottle and was talking to some girl when Opie suddenly came across them and sat down next to Jax._

_Jax was surrounded by Opies smell directly. It has never hit him – but somehow now it did. Surprisingly. And somehow nicely. Jax decided that he really liked this smell._

_He smiled._

“ _What's up, Bro? Wanna join me?”, Jax said and showed the whisky bottle to Ope, but Ope just laughed and took the bottle away._

“ _You've had enough, Jax, my brother.”_

“ _I don't Opes. Never. Let me...- join me!”_

_When Jax reached for the bottle, Ope pushed him softly away. And there it began – the heartbeats. There was no early warning, it just happened._

_Opes hands touched Jax' shoulders, keeping Jax away from the bottle. Instead of fighting for the bottle, Jax began to watch. Slowly and intense. Discovering the very deep green of Opies eyes which he had never recognized before. Not in this light and for sure not with these heartbeats. The last time he felt such an amazing scaring pressure in his chest was when he was nearly shot._

_Opie looked back with a soft smile._

“ _See, you can't look straight anymore, Jax. I'll take you to bed.”_

“ _I don't need a babysitter. You never did this – why.. now?” Jax tried to escape – which failed badly – and landed in Opies arms again._

_Opie laughed. “Com'on, Bro. I have you. Let's go to bed.”_

_And Opie pulled him up, directly in his strong arms – and this was the first time Jax felt complete and safe. He let go of his fighting, letting Opie carry him away from the couch and away from the girl that was somehow not interesting anymore for him._

 

 

Biting his lip thinking about this, Jax suddenly twitched when a cold hand grabbed his neck softly. Turning his head back he saw Clay.

“You're alright? You look pale.”, Clay said, but Jax shook his head.

“I'm alright, just thought about the Mayans. Sorry.”

Jax never had been the type of guy who talked about his feelings – so he stood up, nodded into Clays direction and went out of the room.

 

What a day.

 

 


	2. What's wrong with you?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the nice comment :) It's always hard to write in english for me since it's not my first language but hey... learning by doing :D Let's move on with the story!

„Do you think it is a good idea?“

Opies voice was low in the garage. They had to talk quiet because they didn't knew if Clay was around or not. Jax watched his bike – he didn't wanted to look into Opies face right now. It was hard enough just to stand here and work with him, so he wasn't very keen on having even more heartbeats than he already had now.

“Don't know. Maybe. Maybe not. I haven't thought about this.”, Jax said while he leaned more against his bike to work on the motor. He heard Opie stop working and watching Jax.

“You didn't?”

“No.”

“You always do.”, Opie said and left his tools at his place. Before Jax even realized what was happening, Opie stood right next to him. The sent Jax always tried to ignore came so heavy into his nose that he felt goose bumps rising all over his neck. He sighed.

“I do, but now I haven't, Ope. What's the matter with it? God damn. You and all the others – you suck.”, Jax answered in his most carping tone. 

Opie raised one eyebrow and crossed his arms.

“You know... I'll tell you this as a brother, Jax. For the last few weeks you've changed a lot, and everyone's been asking me why. I told them I don't know and that nothing is wrong. But now I really think... what the hell? What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Jax rolled his eyes but still watched his bike to repair and check for any damages.

“I don't have anything. Everything's fucking fine. And now let me work. If you're done with that go home and fuck Donna. Cause' that's the only thing you can do good.”

There was a tingly silence between both of them, and Jax felt how Opie was trying not to shout at him. He could understand why – because Jax was nothing but an asshole. For the last few weeks he really had been and he knew it. But he couldn't change his behavior. This was too painful. Opies nearness was too much, too much heat, too much feelings Jax wasn't able to stand anymore.

“What was that?”, Opie asked quietly, but somehow his voice went angry.

Jax bit his lips.

“You fucking understood what I said. Go home and let me fucking work.” Jax answered in an aggressive, slowly rising voice. He really tried to stay calm, but Opie was too close. And it fucking killed Jax.

There were only two seconds left in which this disturbing silence lasted, when suddenly two strong hands clutched into Jax' collar and pushed him up against the wall. He felt his back crushing against the wood – Opie built up the pressure, watching him with his deep, green eyes.

Jax swallowed and tried to escape, but Opie was too strong. Waves of heat rushed through Jax' body.

“What the FUCK is wrong with you, Jax? I'm not gonna act like nothing is there in front of the others if you don't tell me RIGHT NOW!”

Jax exhaled and watched Opie – the deep green felt angry. Not soft as always.

“I don't know, Ope, okay? I simply don't know.”

“Do you have trouble with someone? Tara? Some guys? At home?”

“No, Ope, I really don't know. Let me down god damn...”

Opie silently kept his hands against Jax' chest, watching the younger man and vice president a few breaths long, until he finally lowered the pressure and left Jax at the wall.

Jax needed a moment to catch breath and calm down again – okay, this was something he hadn't counted on. Opie was a person that was not easily freaking out, and whatever Jax had done – this here was something they needed to talk about one day. Jax stroke his hair and gazed over to Opie who was on his bike again.

“Ope, I really don't know what's wrong. I'm just fucking... I don't know. Weird.”

Opies eyes strayed over to Jax; he watched the vice president for a moment before he moaned: “God, you make me crazy, Jax. You always do. I hate it if you have a problem that I can't solve.”

_You can_ , Jax thought, but he just smiled.

“Well, maybe one day you can. Or not. We're not drunk enough for that kind of shit.”

“We need to be drunk to talk about it?”

“I guess, yeah. I have to be for sure.”, Jax said and lightly laughed. He had to be _knocking out drunk_ for this, that was safe.

Opie laughed.

“What about tonight? A few beer.. or whiskey.. and you tell me what the fuck ever is wrong with you, Bro.”

Jax smiled lightly and shrugged his shoulders.

“Alright, sounds fine. But let's meet in the club; I don't want Donna to know it.”

_ And I don't want to see Donna. Or see you kissing her. Kissing her when it could be me... _

A slight red tone grew on Jax' cheeks. He tried to hide, but Opie saw it.

“Whatever it is, it must be a women. You never blush.”

Opies laugh was delightful, but Jax was only able to smile again. 

_Not a woman, but you, yeah._

“8 pm.”, Opie said and started his bike.

“Don't forget the fucking whiskey!” Jax shouted and watched Opie riding away. 

In these moments his heart began to slow down a bit. It was a wonder that he had been able to keep his hands under control when Opie had pushed him hard against the wall, because this had left an incredible wild feeling of lust in Jax, a fire that had been stoked deep inside his heart – and his balls.

And tonight they were talking and drinking.

_I'm gonna die_ , Jax thought before he began to work again.

 

 


End file.
